Quote to Self #2: In Denial

In short, Quote to Self is basically where I take a quote from a book I’ve read recently that I feel like applies to my life at the moment and I discuss why.

My last Quote to Self here

I will be discussing the Lunar Chronicles but there will be no spoilers!

Worldly, confident Captain Thorne could never be captivated by plain, awkward her, and she’d been disappointed by such wistful thinking before. 

-Cress, from Winter by Meyer

If you haven’t read the Lunar Chronicles, Cress is a character that shows up in the third book and for the sake of this post, all you need to know is that she is a quirky, socially awkward girl who likes Thorne, who is a kind of a cocky, funny troublemaker type of character. Your resident bad boy except he’s not mysterious.

So for some unfathomable reason, I was so irritated and annoyed when I read this particular line although I really couldn’t put my finger on why it annoyed me so much. I mean, I’m harsh on books, but this line should not offend anyone in any  stretch of the imagination.

But then I realized why it annoyed me so much.

It’s because, it reminded me of well, me.

Hold up, that escalated quickly. Let me explain. Let’s travel back in time..to my childhood specifically maybe 7-8th grade or even through high school… And pretend you could interact with anyone that knew me. Take your pick. You can talk to my sixth grade teacher with her bobbed brown hair and old lady glasses or maybe my then best friend who is the dictionary definition of a goody two shoes or maybe my middle grade archnemesis who came in the form a girl who for some reason found everything hilariously funny or the guy I had a crush on in high school who sat next to me in Spanish. Whatever.

There are two adjectives that they would use to describe me (besides my apparent niceness) and that would be

1. innocent
2. naive 

And I would have hated it. Even though it was probably, actually very true. Since college, I’ve gotten comments like,

“Wow you drink?”

“You actually want to go a club?”

“I can’t imagine you at a rave! What would you even do?”

“Wow I didn’t know you could have dirty thoughts about someone.”

And I realized how different people’s perceptions of me are compared to my own perception of myself. I see myself as someone loving new experiences, other people see me as someone who never leaves the house. Being innocent and naive is not necessarily a fault, it’s probably just who I am, considering my lack of experience with the opposite gender and my lack of life experience in general. It kind of explains why that Cress quote is like a line that’s directly ripped out of my mind whenever I had unrequited feelings for someone because I would never have the guts to actually say I like someone to their face. But I think my annoyance at being coined “innocent” and “naive” is rooted in my deep seated fear of people treating me like I don’t know anything or being too fragile to handle the truth and not even knowing the things that I feel like I should know. It’s kind of like not knowing a swear word and you ask what it is and all your friends are like “whaaat?? you don’t what _____ means?” except that feeling is amplified. Sometimes I feel like I’m always one step behind people, as if my experiences in my sheltered world made me somehow less of a person even though it doesn’t mean that at all. And it leads to questions that I’ve been having a lot lately: Am I denying who I am? Why can’t I just accept that maybe I just am this way? Everyone says be yourself, but what if you don’t really “like” some parts of yourself and you want to throw those traits away and keep the others? Does that mean you’re not you? What if who you want to be is totally contradictory to who you are?

This bias really shows in my reading too. I tend to gravitate towards characters that are really not like me at all but I kind of want to be. I gravitate towards the more cynical, reckless, devil-may-care and worldly characters like Isabelle (from The Mortal Instruments), like Evie from (The Diviners), like sassy and reckless Sage (from The False Prince), like Cinder and Scarlet even though I’m actually a Cress.

Anyways, what are your thoughts on my identity crisis?

 

 

Spoiler Discussion: Winter by Marissa Meyer

This post is just gonna be me ranting about this book. I finally read it and I ended up giving it a 3.5 stars. It would have gotten a 3 stars if it hadn’t been for the pure enjoyability of it. I’m sorry if this post makes absolutely no sense whatsoever.

-Was it just me or did this book just scream The Hunger Games to me?? Like screamed, like in your face, screamed. Except the entire revolution was squeezed into one book. Just no. It was so generic and cliche.

Here are some of the similarities I found:

-rich, ignorant people wearing funky clothes check

-a tyrannical ruler who is so cruel check

-the ruler’s henchmen (aka the thurmaturges) who need to enact extreme violence and murder on the innocent people in order to make Levana seem more evil blah blah blah check

-Different sectors (aka districts) with the outer sectors being poor and the closer ones being rich..There’s even a lumber and agriculture sector (i mean come on really??)

-Cinder is like the face of the rebellion (aka the Mockingjay)

The thing I really liked about the Lunar Chronicles is for one the characters. I think the characters are endearing and fun without being too cliche and cheesy. It’s like the equivalent of Disney characters and despite knowing that, I found myself really annoyed with them in this book. Well, not annoyed, more like bored. Their actions just had an air of predictability to it. For example, when Thorne kissed that Lunar girl because she manipulated him and Cress got really angry and I just knew that the Lunar girl was glamoured to look like Cress. I mean, come on, it’s pretty obvious.

And then the whole conversation that happened after was annoying too like

Cress: I don’t want to be just one of your other girls.

Ugh, can I just roll my eyes. One of the most cliche lines of all time.

Also, when Wolf was modified with something I already forgot and it made him kind of forget Scarlet or made him think that Scarlet didn’t like him. He only forgot Scarlet for like a hot minute and then he was already fighting by her side. Why so much buildup for so little conflict?? Where is the tension?? Anyways I think Wolf and Scarlet are still tied with Cinder and Kai for my favorite couple of the series with Thorne and Cress being my least favorite. IDK WHY, everyone loves Thorne and Cress a lot and I just am kind of meh about them.

I feel like the couples didn’t even spend that much time together and I would have liked more of the friendships to develop and play off each other like Scarlet and Winter. I really liked the interaction between Thorne and Kai but that was only one scene!!

I also couldn’t really get on board with Winter and Jacin as individual characters. I really don’t know why. There was no history to Jacin except his childhood with Winter. It was all fun and cute at the beginning but when I realized that was all Jacin was..I got bored. And I couldn’t really get a good grasp on Winter’s character.

I did really like the whole fight scene at the end though especially how Levana manipulated Thorne to hurt Cress and both of them hurting Cinder; that was pretty epic. And Marissa Meyer really stepped up the action in this book which made it really fun but I feel like she just went through the motions of having a revolution and didn’t really add any surprises..I mean there were surprises just not ones that really surprised me if that makes sense. It just got really boring near the end because they would get themselves into a situation and then escape. Repeat this 500 times. Boorrringg.

And can I just say that the scientific terminology got really annoying. Ok, it might have been me being the science major that I am but when that one doctor says to Winter when she’s on her deathbed: “all her biological systems will shut down.” no one says all your biological systems are going to shut down. That’s just a way of saying you’re dying in a “scientific” way even though it just sounds vague and not scientific at all. Obviously all your biological systems are going to shut down, no one says “biological systems” because your whole body is biological. I really don’t know why I’m ranting so much about this little thing lol.

Also, I can’t really count the number of times, Cinder or someone made a really “inspirational” speech about “omg, no more will you suffer under manipulation from the Lunars if you join me!!@#@#@#$12” like ok cool, let’s move on..

-I really liked all the nods to the original fairytales like the poisoned candy, the kiss while Winter was asleep, how Winter is the fairest of them all and more beautiful than the queen, how Kai gave the cyborg foot back to Cinder near the end.

-And can I just say that I fucking shipped Iko and Kinney from the second they set eyes on each other. Ugh, they would be so cute.

A lot of people have said that they wish one of the main characters had died because the plot was too convenient. First off, did any of the main characters die in Star Wars? That was also an intergalactic war..uh no. Well, I mean does Yoda count? And yet I still got the emotional weight that I should have felt because there was an intergalactic war. This series has a very lighthearted tone to it and if someone had died, I think it would have ruined that tone and feel that the other books had.  What even counts as too convenient? This book was never meant to add to the conversation about war and revolution; it was just meant to be a fun story about good vs. evil. I think it felt convenient because all the character dynamics were really simple.

What did you think about Winter? Did you think some parts were unnecessary? What did you think of the plot and its logistics? The character dynamics? Favorite couple? 🙂

 

The Villain Squad Tag!

I think of October as tapping into your dark side so I’m here with a tag celebrating all the villains we all love and love to hate. This tag was created by 4 people over on booktube. I’ll link Kassidy’s video since she’s was the first I saw. Ok so, you can choose any villains from books, movies, or TV. I stuck mostly to books but I did delve into other media.
Think of your own villain identity and power!

I suck at making up names but I really like the sound of Dark Savior because since I suck even more at thinking of villain names, I decided to go for irony. But the more I thought about it, the more I liked it because I like the fact that a savior is suppose to be the face of hope and obviously save the people from evil but since I’m the savior, there can be no savior..

I also suck at thinking of powers that I want. But I decided the one I want is the telekinesis that Syndrome has in the movie the Incredibles. I mean he can fly so bonus points. I actually thought about having Violet’s power (invisibility and invincibility bubbles) but I would have no offense and I’m not smart enough to use those to my advantage so I’ll just go for flashy 😉

So now to assemble my team! Which villains would you want on your team?
The Leader – Pick a villain to lead the squad.

I have to pick Voldemort for this one because he knows how to gain a following. He knows how to manipulate and persuade plus he’s actually really smart but can be charming at the same time. I mean, he’s basically the ultimate villain.
The Killer Smile – Pick a villain who’s just extremely attractive

Vlane from the Darkfever series. He is a Seelie Prince whose power is basically making people die through sex appeal. His appearance changes with what kind of person you find attractive. Yeah..
The Loose Canon – Pick a villain that marches to the beat of their own drum

Maleficient! I actually have not read the original story but from what I can tell from the movie, she’s a solo villain and doesn’t need anyone to do her dirty work. Also, she can turn into an evil dragon :3

The Unhinged One – Pick a villain that isn’t playing with a full deck.

One of my favorite villains of all time is The Joker because he’s so unhinged but so incredibly smart and is always one step ahead of you and I think that is what makes him truly terrifying. Plus he’s also aesthetically horrifying too.

The Redeemer – Pick a villain that’s on a path of redemption/would play both sides

The first person that popped into my head was Regina from Once Upon a Time. I can’t really explain to you how much I love Regina. Her character arc is so, so beautiful and her character continues to impress me even as Once Upon a Time deteriorates as a show (it’s just gotten worse with every season). She’s literally the queen of sassy comebacks.

The Evil One – Pick a villain that is just bad to the bone.

Sarren from The Immortal Rules trilogy. He is violent, sadistic and shows no mercy. I mean, remember the end of The Eternity Cure?? There is literally no hint of humanity with this one.
The Once-Was-Good – Pick a villain that didn’t originally start out as a villain.

I was going to pick Boromir from Lord of the Rings but I need more lady villains so I’m going with Levana from The Lunar Chronicles. I’m kind of cheating a little because I haven’t read Fairest but from reading and watching videos, it looks like she doesn’t start off as a villain and I think she’s the kind of evil you just love to hate. I figure she can work with Regina to create illusions *evil laugh*

I actually think I have a pretty badass team #squadgoals ;). Who would you pick for your villain squad?

I tag:

Meg @ Little Blog of Books

Samantha @ Dream by Day

Jenna @ Reading with Jenna

Charley @ booksandbakes1

and you!

Rip It or Ship It book tag!

I’ve seen this tag around and I wasn’t tagged by anyone but I thought it was super fun so why not? I tried to include characters (and when I say characters I mean like random characters not just the main ones; you’ll see what I mean) from the popular YA series but I also included some random people like Darcy and Elizabeth from Pride and Prejudice and Batman and Black Widow and one author (Cassandra Clare) because why not lol.

Round 1

Jace Wayland from The Mortal Instruments and Peter Kavinsky from To All the Boys I’ve Loved Before  

Lol…I think they’d be good rivals because I feel like they’re both kind of competitive and arrogant. In a relationship, no, because I hate Jace and love Peter so..Platonically, maybe, I can see it. But overall, RIP IT.

Round 2

Professor Trelawney from HP and Simon Lewis from TMI

NEW OTP. Trelewis? Silawney? Not. But it’s funny because I think Simon would play along with whatever Trelawney is saying even if she doesn’t make sense. Trelawney would probably try to decipher Simon’s future and see the Grim or something lol. RIP IT

Round 3

Draco Malfoy from HP and Queen Levana from The Lunar Chronicles

Um…I would like to see them over tea bonding and complaining about the good guys. Also, they’re vain and conceited. Oh, they also both do magic of a sorts. I can’t tell if that makes them bff’s or archenemies but for now..SHIP IT.

Round 4

Tessa Gray from The Infernal Devices and Effie Trinket from The Hunger Games

Why am I getting all these weird age difference couples? Effie is a little too flamboyant for Tessa but I kinda ship them as opposites attract platonic friends. I feel like Effie would take Tessa out shopping or something..SHIP IT

Round 5

Batman from DC comics and Elizabeth from Pride and Prejudice

What the actual fuck?? I’d like to see this in a time travel romance fanfiction or something lol. I don’t know which one I’d rather see more though. Batman going into 19th century England or Elizabeth going to 21st century Gotham. I feel like both would do well in the respective eras actually. Elizabeth is really resourceful and witty and smart (besides isn’t something of a modern woman anyways) and Batman is so restrained and mysterious anyways. Except I don’t know what’d he do without his Batmobile..I kind of like the idea of them together besides both of them are kind of self-righteous and proud. SHIP IT.

Round 6

Clary Fray from TMI and Augustus Waters from The Fault in Our Stars

To be honest, I feel like Augustus is a little too pretentious for Clary. She’s like the think later, do now type of person and Augustus is super reflective. I’m trying to think of it in an opposites attract type of thing and I can kind of see it? But at the same time, I don’t think they would challenge each other. So RIP IT.

Round 7 

Dobby  from HP and Will Herondale from The Infernal Devices

Awwwww, that’s kind of cute actually. I think Will would be kind of annoyed with him at first but then grow to like Dobby? That’s adorable. SHIP IT.

Round 8 

Lucien from A Court of Thorns and Roses and Four from Divergent

Guys, I think this is my new BroTP. Four would probably always be trying to get Lucien out of trouble and Lucien would try and get Four to lighten up. SHIP IT.

Round 9

Umbridge from HP and Cassandra Clare (author of TMI)

I don’t even know what to think of this. But no one deserves to be with Umbridge so RIP IT though I have a feeling Umbridge would like it whenever Clare kills off a character lol.

Well this was enlightening and fun; feel free to do this tag if you want. I’d love to hear your answers!